Hello there and welcome to a royal wedding free blog. Yes we have decided to ignore events in Windsor as we have no interest in that particular farce. A couple of points to show which way the wind is blowing down here. As she is a divorcee why is she allowed to get married in a Church of England service and why is she wearing white? Just saying. If I had my way we would get rid of the lot of them and have a republic headed by your favourite Eagle. I think this is why I get on so well with my American fanbase which is considerable by now I can tell you.
Anyway on to more positive things. We are very much looking forward to the next couple of weeks as we are expecting visitors. Yes the summer season has started at our little B&B by the church. Last weekend Uncle Brian came down to see me and brought little Paddington along too. We did have a nice time and he is welcome to come back and visit anytime. My European fanclubs are preparing for the next version of Cliffiefest. I must say that I am looking forward to see what they have planned to celebrate me and my achievements. Don’t forget that there is a Cliffie award in it if you get it right and a public shaming if you don’t. No pressure then! More seriously in breaking news I have just been told by my legal team that it might be best to simply say that we are looking forward to seeing everyone and leave it at that-for now.
Summer really has arrived. It is getting warmer and that man has hidden a stash of mint Magnums in the freezer where he thinks that we won’t find them. Ignorance is bliss on that front I think he will find out before too long. This non working lark is getting a bit tedious now as he is very tedious. I don’t really like to tell tales out of school but we are getting a bit fed up with being asked which day it is on a dally basis. I think that we are all looking forward to a break from him before too long. On the plus side Uncle Tache turned up with a bottle of Rhubarb and Ginger Gin which should keep them both quiet for some time yet as it can knock your socks off even if you don’t wear them. Let the good times roll is what I say. In fact I am even willing to raise a toast to the happy couple as long as they agree to go on a very long honeymoon and we don’t need to hear anything more from them for a very long time indeed! Anyway I am off to raid the freezer as I am very partial to mint Magnums. Wish me luck.