Well hello there Gentledudes. Believe or not that man has “graciously” allowed me to be in touch once more. I am not sure why but he has also let me out of solitary confinement. Phew. Ten minutes in there is enough to send you over the edge as it is a small room with a CD player of that man singing along to a lot of well loved hits from his past. It is like being in North Korea and it was the longest ten minutes of my life! Deep cleansing breath now everyone and let us move on.
I have a small problem and it is called Douglas the attention seeking wannabe lamb who seems to have attached himself to me like a limpet. Wherever I turn there is Douglas that is until the other day. He is mildly addicted to the game of hide and go seek and I have warned him that this is a dangerous game to play when you are not that popular in the first place. There is a real chance that he could be in hiding for days as no one has noticed that he has actually gone missing. With that man in charge of headcount it could be a very long wait indeed as he can’t count beyond two without removing his socks. He wouldn’t be told and has now taken up an extreme version of the game involving increasingly tight spots. Well he met his match the other day as he got himself into the tightest of tight spots when he fell behind the bed head and couldn’t be removed. That man had to dismantle half the bedroom to get at him. He was not amused I can tell you. When he was “found” he simply said surprise and ran off to find somewhere else to hide. This is not going to end well I can tell you. Watch this space.
That man has taken the concept of a middle aged a crisis to a whole new level today. He was obeying instructions from Uncle Mike and was hoofing it up to the top of Constitution Hill. Here are a couple of shots of the view from the top.
This shows the harbour threading its way through the landscape to the sea. You can see Brownsea Island, Sandbanks, Studland and Old Harry Rocks in the distance.
This one shows Old Harry and the Isle of Purbeck in close up. Quite a view really.
It wasn’t enough that he got up here he had to get back home as well. Once home he had to do his floor exercises to finish off. Well today the spirit of summer entered his body and he decided to do the floor exercises in the park for all to see. Passer-bys were treated to the spectacle of a hot and sweaty middle aged gentledude lying down on the grass doing planks and raising his bridge. He loved it so if you want some entertainment then let me know and I will pass on his schedule and sell tickets. It could be a nice little earner. Roll up and join the middle aged madness in the park tour. I feel that Victoria Wood would have done it full justice. Still you get the picture. Not very dignified but very funny indeed!
It might be a while before we speak once more as I can sense that man sending me back to solitary once he has read this. Still it has been worth it and I can do the time stood on my head this time round knowing that I have shared this moment with all of you.
Where Eagles fear to flap 